Songfic: Heaven

OK, here is my first attempt at slash. I wrote this back in October last year.
It is not a very happy fic, but I hope you like it!

Warnings: Character death

Rating: R

Thank you SO MUCH to my beta Leanan! I really appreciate it!

Disclaimers: I don't own any of the characters in this fic, they all
belong to Tolkien. The song in this fic is from Hayley Westenra's
album `Pure'.

*Heaven*

No. That one word ran over and over in his mind. No. This wasn't
happening, couldn't possibly be true. Any minute now he'd walk
through the door and laugh at him for being so easily fooled. He'd
be relieved and then angry, they'd kiss and it would all be over.
All over and he could stop living in this nightmare. He closed his
eyes, willed it to be so.
He didn't hear the soft sound of footfalls, as a figure walked up
behind him, didn't react to the gentle voice's concerned questions.
Only when a comforting hand was laid gently on his shoulder did he
turn to see the one who stood behind him.
The sorrow in Elrond's expressive grey eyes brought him painfully
back to reality. "It is time mellon nin." He said quietly.
Time. Time to accept it, time to rip out the last piece of his
heart. Time to say goodbye. Steeling himself, he rose from the chair
and turned to face the Lord. His heart beat wildly inside his chest,
tears barely contained in his eyes. He nodded and slowly followed
the Elven-Lord out of the room.

//A star shining in a universe far away,
My heart knows that we shall meet again some sweet day//

The courtyard was full of elves. There wasn't a spare inch of space
available, yet as he walked by with Elrond, they all parted
respectfully, allowing him passage. In the centre of the circular
courtyard lay a platform made of wood. Atop the platform was a long
woven wicker basket, covered by white silk that did little to hide
the still form in the coffin. A form that had been full of life just
a few short days ago. Life - and love.

He remembered.

Remembered his lips as he woke him that last morning. How delightful
it had been to feign sleep until his lover was leaning right over
him, then to reach out suddenly and pull his naked body close. How
he'd loved the peals of laughter coming from the ruby lips then,
laughter that had turned to moans as he'd engulfed those lips with
his own and pulled his beloved's body even closer. He wondered if
he'd known somehow, that it was their last day together. But no,
his lover had not been gifted with the sight. Still, the passionate
lovemaking that had ensued was without doubt the best he'd ever had.
Not even on the night of their bonding had it been so good.
He hadn't wanted to get up. He could have stayed in that bed all
day. He wished now that he had. If he'd stayed, they wouldn't have
gone riding, wouldn't have encountered the wraith scouting for the
dark lord. Wouldn't have seen him struck down by the morgul sword.

His eyes filled with fresh tears at the painful memory. If only he'd
sensed it earlier. If only he'd been faster, smarter. But he hadn't
been and because of that he'd lost the most precious thing in his
life.

He tried to force the images from his mind, but he could not. The
terrifying sight of the mounted wraith coming towards them was one
he'd never be able to forget.

Neither had hesitated, both drawing their swords and charging into
battle, knowing it was pointless to run. They fought for an age it
seemed, trying to destroy the dark servant. It seemed as though they
were winning. The wraith was backing off, especially after his lover
sent a well-placed arrow into the throat of the demon's unfortunate
mount, killing it instantly. He took the opportunity to dismount and
strike a piece of flint against some dried wood to start a fire. He
rushed towards the wraith with the burning branch, but too late. It
recovered quickly and raised its sword. Before his eyes the tragedy
played out. His lover saw the danger and grabbed the reigns of his
mount, turning the horse around. The wraith had anticipated the move
though and swung his sword in an arc. He vaguely remembered
screaming as the sword sliced through his mate's stomach before he
ran forward and shoved the flames in the wraith's face. It screamed
in pain, retreating rapidly then vanishing as if it had never been.

He dropped to his knees beside his lover's still form and pulled him
into his arms. Trembling, he called to him, begging him to answer.
Pale unfocused eyes met his.

"Thank the Valar." He whispered. "Come, we must get you back to Lord
Elrond." He moved to scoop his mate into his arms, but was stopped
by a hand over his own.
"It's too late." Came a hoarse whisper. "The wound is too great,
even if I do survive, I will become a wraith. I could not bear
that." His failing eyes flicked downwards.
"Not much chance of that though. I'm sorry love, I'm bleeding all
over you."
He choked back tears.
"Please, no. Don't go. Do not leave me!"
"I am sorry meleth." Came the pained reply. "Forgive me."

Weak arms reached out and pulled his lover into one last, tender
kiss. One final word came from between the wounded Elf's lips and
then he succumbed to his injuries.

The howl of pain and loss was heard for miles.

//And you, you will be the flame that burns in my breast.
And oh, I know just by knowing you I was blessed,
Yes I was truly blessed//

He stood beside his lover's body that been cleaned and prepared for
his final journey. Elrond was speaking, talking about his friend's
loyalty and warm heart.

He didn't hear.

As he gazed at the still, silk-shrouded form, his mind was pulled
back to the night they had begun their relationship, many centuries
ago.

The November eve had brought with it a chill wind and a touch of
frost. To venture out was folly and so many had found evening
pursuits within the shelter of the Last Homely House.
They had both retreated to Lord Elrond's library to read, not
expecting the other to be there. A game of chess had ensued, an
activity in which they were both equally skilled. They were a good
match, warrior and scholar, long years of diplomacy had made one a
shrewd, careful player, while the other had instincts honed to
perfection from long years as a soldier, allowing him to swiftly
analyse his opponent's moves.

The game had gone on for hours and both were tiring, but neither
would forfeit. Move and counter move; it was as intricate as any
battle or debate. It was in the early hours of the morning, when
both raised their eyes from the board and gazed at each other
without a word, both simultaneously reaching for their kings to lay
them surrendered upon their sides.

He had leaned back and sighed deeply.

"Tired?" A voice teased from across the table. He shot the other a
withering glare.

"It *is* three in the morning Mellon Nin." He had replied dryly, his
companion's laughter echoing round the room.

"You are weaker than I thought! The night is young yet!" The glare
he shot him could have easily frozen the fires of Mount Doom, but
his companion had only laughed again.
"I suppose you can think of a better way to spend the night hours?"
The reply was icily cool.

The laughing Elf only nodded confidently.

"Oh yes." He replied.

"Do tell." He had returned, resigned.

To his surprise, the other had not retorted, but had risen from his
chair and was now walking towards him.

"What are you doing…" He asked, slightly nervous now.

"Answering your question." Came the soft reply before ruby lips were
pressed firmly over his.

His eyes opened wide and his mind told him to move, but his body
refused to listen. He moaned in pleasure and deepened the kiss, his
arms snaking out to encircle the other's waist. Before he knew what
was happening he was being straddled, the other Elf's firm legs
snaking round his thighs. Kisses became deeper and more passionate,
hands began to wander. Kisses, caresses and moans, it was almost
enough to undo them on the spot. There was no doubt as to where this
was leading, though he had no desire to partake in that particular
act in a library.

With great effort, he stood and pulled his partner to his feet and
silencing the other with a finger over his lips, shaking his head.

"Not here." He whispered. "My quarters."

The other nodded assent and he took him by the hand and led him to
his rooms.

//Heaven, Heaven, ooh waiting there for me
Heaven, Heaven, ooh always let it be//

That had been the beginning. Soon they realised that what they had
was more that lust, it was love… and now that love was gone.

At a gesture from Elrond, he stepped up to the pyre and pulled back
a little of the silken shroud, revealing his beloved's pale face.
Shaking, he placed a gentle, chaste kiss on his forehead. Then he
stepped back and covered his love again. Elrond handed him a torch,
the handle carved of white ivory, the top burning with a golden
flame. Tears stung hot in his eyes as he lowered the torch and lit
the pyre, committing his beloved to the flames. As the fire engulfed
the still figure he let his last good-bye slip from his lips.

"Naamarie, meleth nin."

It seemed like they had only been together for a moment in time and
he could still clearly recall their bonding day twelve hundred years
ago.

He laughed as he pulled his lover close. "There is no getting rid of
me now!"

"That suits me!" Came the affectionate reply. "Why should I ever
wish to be apart from you?"

He had answered that question with a deep loving kiss. Normally he
was a little more reserved about public displays of affection, but
today it did not matter. Today was their day.

The music began and he found himself pulled into a lively dance.
Grinning, he grabbed his mate round the waist and pulled him close.
Arms wrapped around his neck and they danced wildly, to the cheers
and applause of the others.
The celebrations had gone on for long into the night. However, they
had slipped off just before midnight, to the luxurious celebration
chambers reserved especially for occasions such as this. The huge
bed took up most of the room; the space that was left was lavishly
decorated with carved white furniture and snowy satin. Thick drapes
at the window shielded the room from prying eyes and bowls of ripe
fruits and sweets covered a long table along with several bottles of
Rivendell's finest wine.

All this went unnoticed however, as the couple had eyes only for
each other. He pressed his lips to his mate's, gently easing his
tongue into the other's mouth. Lips parted and his tongue began a
through exploration, while his hands began to divest his lover of
his celebratory robes.

His partner returned the favour and it was not long before they were
both naked and entwined within the other's embrace. He found himself
being gently guided to the bed and pressed into the silky sheets.
Warm lips trailed kisses from his forehead, moving to his eyes and
lingering there for a moment. Then the sensual mouth continued,
raining the lightest of kisses on his lips. As he resumed his
exploration of his lover's body, his mouth moved down across the
expanse of his mate's chest, making him gasp with pleasure. Further
he travelled, feather-like kisses making hid beloved tremble as they
trailed across his abdomen. He gave a low cry as the kisses reached
his arousal and he grabbed hold of his lover's shoulders and pulled
him close.

"By the Valar, I love you." He moaned hoarsely. A low chuckle came
in reply.

"I love you too. Now let me prove it."

Moving until he was astride his mate's thighs, he leaned down,
kissing him thoroughly before slipping between his open legs. A hand
moved and he gasped as gentle fingers wrapped around his aching
arousal and began to stroke softly. He moaned, the sound muffled as
his mate's kiss engulfed his mouth completely.

The kiss ended too soon and he groaned at the loss thought it soon
became a cry of pleasure when his mate moved down and took him
boldly into his mouth. He bucked his hips and groaned as he was
brought to the edge of his desire by his lover's thorough attention.
With a ragged cry his release washed over him, his erratic breathing
halting his speech.

Pleased, his bonded reached over and palmed the bottle of vanilla-
scented oil that had been placed there by a considerate servant.
Sitting up, he coated his own arousal with the sweet scented fluid,
before shifting and gently rolling his lover on to his stomach.
Grasping his hips he positioned himself by his lover's entrance.
With a single firm thrust he slid fully into his partner's warmth.

He felt his lover slide into him and he groaned. "Ai, please," he
moaned softly.

"Hush." Came the voice as it purred against his ear. "All things
come to those who wait."

With that he began to move, slowly at first, but then increasing in
speed and rhythm. He moved with smooth carefully positioned thrusts,
trying to give his mate as much pleasure as possible.

He moaned as his lover moved against him, feeling the sweet pleasure
increase with each thrust. He felt himself grow hard again, despite
having come so recently and as his lover screamed his name and
shuddered deep within him, he felt his own control slipping, though
he had no complaints. To lose control to his bonded lover was
something he would always willingly submit to.

He let out a small gasp as his mate collapsed onto his back.
Rolling over carefully, so as not to move his lover too much, he
shifted onto his back and held his bonded close on top of him.

"Have I told you lately how much I love you?" He grinned at the
figure atop him.

"Not in the last few minutes!" Came the cheeky reply. He laughed and
pulled his lover against him for a deep kiss.

"Well then," he whispered, "I had best prove my love to you as you
have just proved yours to me!"

With that, he proceeded to show his new mate just how much he meant
to him until they were both utterly spent.

Exhausted, they drifted into sleep still wrapped in each other's
arms.

//So why, tell me why the good die young my old friend
I pray that heaven waits for everyone in the end//

Tears fell unchecked down his face as the pyre burned steadily. He
cared not who saw his grief, they had never hidden their love
before, he would not hide it now. His breathing was ragged; he had
to force the air into his lungs. Breathing felt like such an effort
now that his heart was gone.

He felt Elrond lay his hand on his forearm.

"Why?" He choked. "Why was he taken?"

He had become so protected from death in the last peaceful
centuries. Death had been all but forgotten, an easy thing when one
was immortal, but all the more painful when it did strike, for when
an eternal flame is extinguished, it is a young death, no matter the
age.

"I wish I had the answers mellon nin." Elrond replied. "No-one knows
why these things happen. But I know in my heart that this is not the
end. The Valar are not that cruel. You will be with him again, of
that I am sure."

He turned pain-filled eyes to the Lord.

"You truly believe that?" He asked softly and Elrond nodded.

"Aye. It may be many years, longer even, but you will hold him in
your arms again when he is released at last to Valinor. Then
eternity will be yours and this heartache will be but a distant
memory. But until that day comes, you must be strong and hold true
to your love. I know it will not be easy, sometimes I think I cannot
last another day without Celebrian, but you can, you must, make it
through. You are not alone. I will be here for you whenever you need
me."

He nodded, moving his hand to cover Elrond's.

"Thank you." He whispered and Elrond offered a soft smile in reply.

They stood for many hours, watching the flames and even after all
the others had gone, they remained, until the fire was nothing more
than smoke and ash.

"It grows cold," Elrond said softly. "We should go inside."

"You go my friend. I wish to spend some time alone." He said
quietly.

Elrond nodded.

"You know where I am should you need me." Replied the Elven Lord as
he turned and left his friend to walk back towards the House.

He stood, still staring at the smoke from the pyre. In the plumes he
thought he could see his beloved's face as he slowly drifted up to
the heavens, through the darkening sky.

//And love, love is how we cross that bridge to the light
A star that is what you are in my darkest night
Be always by my side//

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them
again, the smoke was all but gone and the sky was completely dark.
Matted clouds had settled over the night sky, hiding even Ithil's
glow.
"Where are you?" He whispered and as if in answer to his question, a
gentle breeze wafted across the sky, clearing a few of the clouds.
In the tiny expanse of night now visible, something glittered. A
single star, brighter than a silmaril to his eyes, glowed in the
heavens. Not Earendil, the position was wrong, but an entirely new
star, the only one to shimmer in the velvet blackness. His eyes
locked upon it, drinking in its brightness, letting it cast a light
on his gloomy heart.

"Is it you?" He asked softly, knowing he would get no reply. He
hardly dared hope, though it was possible, he surmised. If Elrond's
father was up there, why could not his beloved dwell there as well?
He felt suddenly comforted by that thought. Elrond had claimed his
father was always nearby, that anytime he wanted to see him, he just
had to look to the night sky.

He swallowed the lump in his throat as he stared at the silver orb.
It seemed to be directly above him, no matter where he moved.
Guiding him, watching him.

"Oh Valar." He whispered brokenly. "Thank you."

He stood standing there for many hours until the night faded and a
new day began. As golden light flooded the dawn sky he lost sight of
the Silver Star, but his heart felt somewhat lighter. It was still
there and he would see it again that night. He would see it every
night, until the Valar eventually released his love from the Grey
Halls.
Until then, he would take his strength from the light, allow it to
be a constant reminder of what they had and would have again, just
as Elrond had said.

//Heaven, Heaven, ooh waiting there for me
Heaven, Heaven, ooh always let it be//

The wait would be long and he knew that. But as the sun rose higher
in the sky, he began to feel more confident that he could do this.
His beloved had never been afraid of anything; it would not do for
him to start fearing the future now. He would honour his mate's
memory and he would be strong.

Taking in a deep breath of early-morning air, he strode
purposefully to the gardens where he had made his bonding request.
He came to the tree they had been sitting under and knelt. He laid
his hand on the bark and remembered the stunned look on his lover's
face when he had asked him to become his bonded, and how overjoyed
he had felt at the blushing consent he'd received.

"I love you so much." He whispered.

"I love you too. It surprises me sometimes." Was the reply.

He smiled and took the other's hands in his own.

"I have a question for you." He said, slightly nervously.

"You can ask me anything, you know that."

He laughed slightly and freed his right hand, slipping it into his
pocket. He emerged holding a small box covered in midnight velvet.
He flipped it open to reveal a simple mithril band with a single
ruby in the centre.

"Then – I would ask if you would consent to bond yourself to me,
that we may always be together." He looked into the other's eyes,
almost afraid of what he might find.

His fears were unfounded though, as the gaze that met his was full
only of love and deep joy.

"Aye." He replied and smiled. "I will bind myself to you, for all of
eternity."

His eyes were filled with tears of joy as the mithril band was
slipped onto his beloved's finger.
He pulled his newly betrothed close and kissed him. "I swear," he
whispered, "I will love you for all time. Nothing will ever come
between us."

Nothing will ever come between us. How well he remembered speaking
those words. He stood and held his head up high. He would always
hold to that. Their love was too strong to be defeated by death.

"I will see you again," he vowed. "Even if I have to wait until the
end of time." He smiled softly as the light caught his own bonding
ring that was ever a reminder of their love.

"Amin mela lle Erestor. Forever."

With that, Glorfindel turned, walking towards the house where
friends and family were waiting for him. For until the day came when
they would at last be reunited, he would follow Erestor's dying
request, the final word he had whispered softly into Glorfindel's
ear.

"Live."

//Heaven, Heaven, ooh waiting there for me
Heaven, Heaven, ooh always let it be//

*The End*


So, what did you think? Did you guess which one died?
It's funny, I felt worse about putting Glorfy through all that pain
than I did about killing Erestor!